★ 2 / 10
Only watch this after seeing 'Gone in 60 Seconds (1974)' first!!!
KnatLouie
Back in 1991, the once-talented actor, Ulli Lommel (famous for his work with R. W. Fassbinder and Andy Warhol) decided that he wanted to make a quick buck and…
Back in 1991, the once-talented actor, Ulli Lommel (famous for his work with R. W. Fassbinder and Andy Warhol) decided that he wanted to make a quick buck and make an action-movie full of car-chases and fast cars. But as he apparently did not have enough time/money to make it properly, he just lifted a massive 40-odd minutes from H. B. Halicki's legendary 'Gone in 60 Seconds (1974)' heist movie, which he spliced badly together with new footage - and this was in an 80-ish minute long film nonetheless! I'm not sure how the makers of 'The Big Sweat' managed to not get sued for this, but surely they must had found some loophole that allowed them to use so much lifted footage from such a classic - and instantly recognizable - feature film!
Now, if only the footage had been spliced together in a believeable fashion, but NO - all the old footage both looks AND feels like it's from the early 70's, and the new footage is clearly from the early 90's! Cars don't match, actors don't match, clothes don't match, and all the new footage consists of super-closeups of the leading actors + some random, sweaty and shouting cops from inside their cars (with completely white exteriors by the windows, so it's impossible to see what's going on outside - for obvious reasons).
To make matters even worse, the actual plot of the movie is almost completely incomprehensible - and even the bits which make sense are utterly ridiculously framed and explained! Apparently this Marco guy (played by one-shot "actor" Steven Molone) has just gotten out of jail, but has some troubles with a notorious gangster boss, Joe Rinks (played by Peter Sherayko in one of very few non-western roles, only appearing for about 5 minutes total), and the police wants him to testify against him, which is is very reluctant to do, so they assign a tough-as-nails, ponytailed police detective to try and persuade him to witness.
The cop on the case, Troudou, is played by legendary giga-jaw Robert Z'Dar, whom most movie-fans know best from the "Maniac Cop"-series, as well as the cheesy "Samurai Cop", plus a plethora of smaller parts in action-movies like "Tango & Cash" or the absurd "A Gnome Named Gnorm". He constantly has an unlit cigar in his mouth, which at the end of the film looks very soggy by the end that's in his mouth (they could probably only afford to have that one cigar for the entire shoot - which most likely only took about 2 days to film, by the looks of it). The older character actor Ken Letner (who starred with Ulli Lommel in "Strangers in Paradise (1984)") plays the police chief here, who has a handful of random scenes where he shouts at other cops, and then just randomly exits. He died shortly after filming this, as his career had sadly already died with this appearance.
Anyway, the rest of the movie consists of very poorly shot exterior scenes of people walking on the street, or having akwardly scripted dialogue that has almost zero relation to what else is going on. (And note all the visible crew members in window or mirror reflections as well - hilariously inept planning, not even editing could save this!). There is also an extremely poorly shot bank robbery sequence, that is unbelievably easy for them to pull off - and for some reason Marco and his buddy can persuade lots of young women to help them out with this, of course. Sigh.
I would definitely recommend seeing this ONLY after just having watched 'Gone in 60 Seconds (1974)' , so you can laugh at how ridiculously they have spliced that footage into this garbage. As other reviewers have already mentioned, this movie is ONLY worth seeing for Z'Dar's performance, which is short, but hilarious! Otherwise only see it as an example of how NOT to make a film!
Recently released on a surprisingly well restored Blu-Ray by Dark Force Entertainment, that has a fun interview with Production Manager Jeff McKay (who starts out by apologizing if his interview is boring, but still not as dull as the film itself! :D
Movie: 1/10. (Would've been a minus one if possible)
Z'Dar's jawline: +1 star.
Total: 2/10.
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★ 1 / 10
R.I.P. Robert Z'Dar
saint_brett
You'll have to forgive me, and I feel silly for saying this, but I only found out just yesterday that Robert Z'Dar was dead. I was unaware of this occurrence…
You'll have to forgive me, and I feel silly for saying this, but I only found out just yesterday that Robert Z'Dar was dead.
I was unaware of this occurrence in 2015. (There was no mention of his passing in any of our newspapers.)
I'm going to dedicate tonight's review in honor of Robert Z'Dar aka Zdarsky, aka Darcy.
I "borrowed" a fair few of his movies off YouTube and saved them on a USB stick at the library, and it's taken me three days to finally figure out that the poor 360p quality of the analog transfers are giving me major migraines. (Four straight headaches, counting today.)
Oh no, not one of these bang 'em up car crash movies from the 1980s like "Dukes of Hazzard." None of this Evil Carnival crap is impressive anymore!
It's all telegraphed and staged on cue.
OH NO! Ulli Lommel-enough said. This is an automatic 1/10 if Ulli Lommel is at the helm.
What looks like Dallas Winston, returned from the dead, is released from college after a five-year stint, and straight away he goes scouting at Lake Berryessa for Zodiac locations.
An entire scene is wasted with Patrick Dempsey sitting around talking about skating rinks with two other dreadful actors. It's "Things" stuff.
Z'Dar's partnered with Vinnie Schtulman, and he's quite jovial for a change. Wait a minute! You're telling me he's not a baddy in this? That's a first.
Hollywood should honor Robert Z'Dar as well and make the next "Predator" movie be about a bunch of opposing aliens coming to Earth in a race to find, and dig up, Maniac Cop's body to claim the treasured skull.
It's rare for Z'Dar to star in a movie, as nine times out of ten he's just a bit player. Can he hold his own as a lead in this? We'll find out. (The star lead nothing!)
Who's this Schwimmer guy?
After 28 minutes, the movie's supposed to star Maniac Cop, not this terrible Marco fella! He's a terrible actor! And he's the star of the movie, not Z'Dar.
Terrible edits. Shaky camera work and horrible, ugly actors with silly looks on their faces. Lame car chase scenes that fail to make your heart race. No storyline. No plot. Economy score. Stupid subplots. Poor dialog.
They pay tribute to an Andy Sidaris model aeroplane setting. (Another horrible movie director.)
Why are these random cars just crashing into each other?
Who thought this would make for enthralling viewing?
This has got to be the longest car chase scene in film history, and not one second of it is slightly intriguing or well filmed.
It's not Robert Z'Dar's fault this movie sucks; that lies directly at the feet of Ulli Lommel. Should I remind you that he's responsible for "Curse of the Zodiac?"
That movie's guilty on all counts. It's the one that inflicts a thousand Chinese papercuts into the viewer, then dips you in salt and vinegar. There are still serious repercussions for "Curse of the Zodiac." Don't think I'll forget any time soon.
"The Big Sweat" is so lame that at the 57-minute mark, Ulli Lommel speeds the footage up in an attempt to make it look like the cars are going faster than they actually are, but this just blows the cover of poor filmmaking and reveals and admits that the car chase scene fails to excite and is wooden and not free flowing like they think it is.
I'm going to have to rewind this whole car chase scene and time how long it goes for - this is ridiculous.
It's not even good footage.
"The Big Sweat" is so boring that I'll tell you a fact about me when I was 15 years old. I used to scoop 10 passionfruit's into a big glass and then dump 20 teaspoons of sugar on 'em. True story. I'd eat each individual seed separately while watching karate movies. And I had headaches back then, too. (Gee, I wonder why?)
Is there any logical explanation why this movie won't end?
You can clearly tell that Z'Dar was off set and filming other projects in between "The Big Sweat," which means he wasn't dedicated to Lommel.
He's hardly in this. Lead actor nothing.
How did I know this movie would end on "that" note with the burning photo? There is no resolution, no satisfaction from vengeance, and no end to this!
Ulli Lommel movies should be eradicated from the face of this planet!
It's more fun suffering from chicken pox than watching a Ulli Lommel movie.
The car chase scene starts at the end of the 29-minute mark and goes till the one hour and six-minute mark.
Oh, and Robert Z'Dar proves time and again that he'll be forever remembered as a 1/10 actor.
It's hard to build a defense for him. Even with that big jaw of his.
Jaw to the world and let us sing.
RIP, Maniac Cop. 1950-2015.
You one out of ten actor, you.
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80%
AUDIENCE
3.1/10
214
